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I have the hugest apple in my hand right now. That I bought in Japan. And forgot to eat on the plane.

I have one urge: to carry it home again tonight and remember to take a photo of it and show it to you and you'll be like HOLY FUCKING CRAP I'VE NEVER SEEN AN APPLE THAT BIG and WOW I CAN TOTALLY UNDERSTAND PAYING 525 YEN (about 5 bucks) for it, it's SO huge and AWESOME! It's bigger than a 8-10 oz coffee cup! And wider!

And then I have this other, much stronger, much more easily satisfied urge: and that is to EAT IT. Now.

Bygones. You'll see a big huge apple somewhere else someday and then you'll think of me and how my needs won out over your needs because when it comes to hunger, you better believe I am one selfish bitch. It smells delicious and I am eating it starting Right. Fucking. NOW! Bye!

Posted by Duff at April 1, 2008 05:22 PM

Comments

Don't you carry a camera around with you? Well, I know how big those apples are, so eat away, dh!

Posted by: Mariko at April 1, 2008 07:20 PM

You can't bring fruit into the country, anyway. Unless it's in your stomach.

Posted by: Sashi at April 1, 2008 07:25 PM

Very garden of eden post today. Just eat the darn thing and I hope it's delicious. I'm eating strawberries and dates. Regular sized.

Posted by: sil at April 1, 2008 08:09 PM

High roller! I hope you enjoyed that gigantic apple. Did you see any huge grapes while you were here? Those still make me laugh.

Posted by: molly! at April 1, 2008 11:45 PM

I have Super Apples in my fridge right now, and will happily photograph one so that you don't have to deal with the guilt.

Posted by: Jennifer at April 2, 2008 12:27 AM

How did you manage to smuggle a giant apple past security?

Posted by: Jan at April 2, 2008 07:24 AM

you crack me up

Posted by: brenda in toronto at April 2, 2008 08:23 AM

I bought 5 apples this past weekend at a festival. I'll glue them together and I bet my new apple is bigger than yours :)

Posted by: Bill V at April 2, 2008 08:51 AM

i shall imagine it in all it's glory, hope it tastes as awesome as it sounds.

Posted by: Amy at April 2, 2008 12:40 PM

You are cracking me up! It's true -- for the rest of my life, I will think of you (if and) when the subject of super-huge apples arises.

Posted by: Mary at April 3, 2008 08:55 AM

Apple stories without pictures are just like fish stories without pictures.

Suspect.

Posted by: claudia at April 3, 2008 04:16 PM

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